Good Morning Snitches:
Tony Bennett. Garth Brooks (New York Mets Superfan and former Spring Training invitee). Roger Daultry of the Who. Steven Tyler. Paul McCartney.
He opened with Miami 2017 (for the best live performance ever, type in "Miami 2017" into YouTube and go to the Concert for New York City link). Ended with "Let it Be" feat Paul McCartney. Steven Tyler did "Walk This Way". Tony Bennett, of course, did New York State of Mind. Garth Brooks did some decent country song and I forgot who Who song R.D. rocked with Joel.
Best concert I've ever been to. Bar none.
Anyway, its time for my Fire Department physical, I really hope I pass!
Saturday, July 19, 2008
Friday, July 18, 2008
A little re-introduction and an open invitation to the Dr. Licktapeen Freedom Festival
Its been a while folks and I know how bad it has been for you, but it was for your own good and only makes you realize how much you love This Kid Mongo, so thank me later. But allow me to re-introduce myself to the readership. People call me the Rust man. I'm the stylish one of the group. I know what you're thinking and the answer is yes. I have a nick name for my penis. Its called the Dairy King, but I also nick named my testes - my left one is James Brolin and my right one is Father Sean Donovan. You ladies play your cards right and you just might get to meet the whole gang. But for now let me do what I really came here to do.
Im gonna lay a little history lesson down on you folks like a classic episode of Welcome Back, Kotter. Now sit up straight and pay attention....There was a time, a time before now. When the local resident doctor reigned supreme. When people believed everything the good doctor said. This was an age when only men were allowed to be doctors. And in Garden City, one physician was more man then the rest. His name was Lenny Licktapeen. He was like a god walking amongst mere mortals. His waiting room smelled of rich mahogany. He had an examination technique that could make a wolverine purr and labcoats so fine they made Clooney and McDreamy look like hobos. In other words, Lenny Licktapeen was the balls.
Well I'm here to tell you that this modern day Jonas Salk is back baby. And thanks to tort reform and the current presidential administration, as well as some other factors...he is ready to practice his love with all the beautiful lady patients of the world. So consider this notice guys and dolls. And happy hunting Doc. Enjoy the house calls!
Im gonna lay a little history lesson down on you folks like a classic episode of Welcome Back, Kotter. Now sit up straight and pay attention....There was a time, a time before now. When the local resident doctor reigned supreme. When people believed everything the good doctor said. This was an age when only men were allowed to be doctors. And in Garden City, one physician was more man then the rest. His name was Lenny Licktapeen. He was like a god walking amongst mere mortals. His waiting room smelled of rich mahogany. He had an examination technique that could make a wolverine purr and labcoats so fine they made Clooney and McDreamy look like hobos. In other words, Lenny Licktapeen was the balls.
Well I'm here to tell you that this modern day Jonas Salk is back baby. And thanks to tort reform and the current presidential administration, as well as some other factors...he is ready to practice his love with all the beautiful lady patients of the world. So consider this notice guys and dolls. And happy hunting Doc. Enjoy the house calls!
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Me, Myself and Irene
Well folks, there have been some fascinating developments in my life the past few days. If you saw the movie Me, Myself and Irene, you may remember the part where his wife left him for the midget, and the color of his sons' skin. Lets just say it was similar to that, sans the children and marriage (thank you baby Jesus, as that might've happened before terribly long, with the aforementioned events unknown to me save for my finding out randomnly via espionage).
Now, I'm in the process of recovery, which might include doing some examinations of new female patients. If you know a girl with loose morals, who would be interested in dating a medical doctor who is held in high regard in his field, please contact me immediately. I will be attempting in good faith to wet my whistle without assistance, but your assistance will be greatly appreciated.
I was thinking how much it is going to suck moving home with my parents, but then I realized that the legendary wedding-crashing guru from Wedding Crashers played by Will Farrell still lived at home, and I'm assuming his character was a lot older than mine, and he had a hot chick. Plus, meatloaf is fucking awesome and his mom was making it for him (she took forever though).
In the coming months, I will be attempting to sculpt my body into the image of a Greek God, and I started the process of that a few months ago. Now, I'm happy to say that I'm less of a quivering mound of love pudding and have done some good work increasing my overall level of jack-sticity. I heard chicks prefer that to a quivering mound of love pudding.
I've been thinking about my past sexual encounters and in a way being single is very exciting. I mean, I've done some crazy shit, mostly during college, med school and during my residency, and I'm kind of excited to experience it again once every couple of months (I'm guessing that will be the frequency). Every once in a while, something so crazy happens that you have to tell all your friends. Like "butt-erfingers" in college, but that is another story for another day.
I promise my loyal readership one thing and one thing only: when I am out on the prowl, I will aim for the stars, but I will NOT hesitate to do what is necessary to get a thorough knob-polishing, because I'm awesome like that. One of my teachers at med school once said "any port in a storm", which didn't make a lot of sense because I'm not an avid boater. Then it dawned on me, the dog was the storm, and industry, now that was a revolution.
I will of course keep you updated,
Sleepless in Garden City
Now, I'm in the process of recovery, which might include doing some examinations of new female patients. If you know a girl with loose morals, who would be interested in dating a medical doctor who is held in high regard in his field, please contact me immediately. I will be attempting in good faith to wet my whistle without assistance, but your assistance will be greatly appreciated.
I was thinking how much it is going to suck moving home with my parents, but then I realized that the legendary wedding-crashing guru from Wedding Crashers played by Will Farrell still lived at home, and I'm assuming his character was a lot older than mine, and he had a hot chick. Plus, meatloaf is fucking awesome and his mom was making it for him (she took forever though).
In the coming months, I will be attempting to sculpt my body into the image of a Greek God, and I started the process of that a few months ago. Now, I'm happy to say that I'm less of a quivering mound of love pudding and have done some good work increasing my overall level of jack-sticity. I heard chicks prefer that to a quivering mound of love pudding.
I've been thinking about my past sexual encounters and in a way being single is very exciting. I mean, I've done some crazy shit, mostly during college, med school and during my residency, and I'm kind of excited to experience it again once every couple of months (I'm guessing that will be the frequency). Every once in a while, something so crazy happens that you have to tell all your friends. Like "butt-erfingers" in college, but that is another story for another day.
I promise my loyal readership one thing and one thing only: when I am out on the prowl, I will aim for the stars, but I will NOT hesitate to do what is necessary to get a thorough knob-polishing, because I'm awesome like that. One of my teachers at med school once said "any port in a storm", which didn't make a lot of sense because I'm not an avid boater. Then it dawned on me, the dog was the storm, and industry, now that was a revolution.
I will of course keep you updated,
Sleepless in Garden City
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
Don't tell me, fellow reader, you are one of these...
Let me preface this by saying I apologize for the recent lack of updates. With work blowing up (how about billing 50 hours from Fri morning to Sunday evening - and 16 hours each from Wed, Thurs, and tonight, Tuesday) it's been crazy. Add that to the fact that my significant other may very well lose her job in the next 2 weeks and its been a bit hectic.
So anyway, this new poll says that public opinion has generally shifted with regard to our energy crisis; far more liberals, and younger people (that includes you, dear reader) are leaning towards drilling, rather than conservation/alternative energy, as the solution to the energy crisis going on. http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/25482959/
Seriously?!?! Come on people, WTF are you thinking? People think that by drilling and drilling, ruining our environment and other protected natural resources, it will save us a few pennies in gas? I'm surprised that liberals and young people have shifted; frankly, you would think they know that drilling won't change prices much, and even so, we won't see an effect for 10 or so years. I think that we're getting misguided here.
I don't want to frame the presidential debate as drilling v. conservation, but it looks like its heading that way. Sure, we have some traitors - i mean "patriots" - within the Democratic party...but, I'm shocked that people actually think drilling is the answer.
Wow....
back to work for me...enjoy ladies
So anyway, this new poll says that public opinion has generally shifted with regard to our energy crisis; far more liberals, and younger people (that includes you, dear reader) are leaning towards drilling, rather than conservation/alternative energy, as the solution to the energy crisis going on. http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/25482959/
Seriously?!?! Come on people, WTF are you thinking? People think that by drilling and drilling, ruining our environment and other protected natural resources, it will save us a few pennies in gas? I'm surprised that liberals and young people have shifted; frankly, you would think they know that drilling won't change prices much, and even so, we won't see an effect for 10 or so years. I think that we're getting misguided here.
I don't want to frame the presidential debate as drilling v. conservation, but it looks like its heading that way. Sure, we have some traitors - i mean "patriots" - within the Democratic party...but, I'm shocked that people actually think drilling is the answer.
Wow....
back to work for me...enjoy ladies
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